Unwritten
by DragonVerse
Summary: If you were given the chance to go back in time to change your past, would you do it? A year after returning to earth, nineteen year old Lost is presented with that very opportunity, but at a great cost. Will Lost turn on her new found family to save her past or will she accept her fate? Found out in the sequel to Redemption.
1. Chapter 1

**Description: Rated K+: Some minor language. Please read Redemption before reading this story.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dragon Ball, Dragon Ball Z, or Dragon Ball GT. No copyright intended.**

**Redemption 2: Unwritten**

**Summary: One year after returning to earth, Lost is still struggling with her lack of humanity and compassion for others. Spending most of her time training and trying to be the devoted daughter and loving sister, Lost is exhausted. She is more than ready for the world tournament to finally begin. With a plan to beat her way to the top, Lost quickly proves to be one of the strongest Z fighters. Things are looking up for Lost, until a mysterious stranger threatens to rewrite her history.**

**Claiming to have the ability to travel both backward and forward in time, a mysterious stranger offers to take Lost back in time to prevent her kidnapping. There is, however, a catch. Lost must join him in taking over the universe and become his bride.**

**Chapter One**

**The Domestic Life**

"I don't understand the purpose of this," I said, walking over to the cliffs edge and staring out at the forest around me, "You want me to hunt you?"

"No," Pan said. I turned around to see her standing a few feet away, her legs bent into a stretch, "You're just supposed to try and find me."

"And then what?" I asked. I crossed my arms over my chest and eyeing the little girl. She was up to something, kids usually were. I just had to figure out what it was.

"Then you have to try and tag me," Pan moved effortlessly into another stretch that worked her sides, bending to one side and stretching out her arms.

"Tag," I repeated.

"Yes, Lost," Pan gave me a pitiful look, "Didn't you ever play Hide n' Seek when you were a kid?"

And that is what Pan was up too. "I was never a kid," I reminded her, "What do you mean _play_? Is this a game? You told me it was a training exercise!"

"It is!" Pan insisted, looking up at me with big dark eyes, "Well, kind of. It was the only way I could think to get you to play with me."

"So you lied," I started to turn away, "I don't play, Pan. The Tournament is tomorrow and I have training to do."

"You're my babysitter, Lost!" Pan yelled at my back, "You're supposed to play with me and keep me entertained. Or do you just not care about my happiness?"

I stopped and dropped my head in defeat. I really shouldn't let this little girl manipulate me like this, but she was right. I was never going to get better at being her aunt if I always pushed her way. I turned halfway around so I could stare at the kid, "What's tag?"

Pan jumped into the air, victorious, and ran over to me. She put her hand up and wacked me on the arm, "That's a tag, but you can be anywhere on the body. You do that and you win the game!"

"Okay," I said, "I'll play _one_ game. Then I'm going back to my training and you'll take a nap or do whatever it is kids do."

"Deal," Pan said, a huge grin sliding across her face, "Now close your eyes, count to ten, and then come find me."

I closed my eyes. _One_. I hated stupid freaking Gohan. I don't know how I let him talk me into this.

_Two._ Earlier that day I had been at the Son house training in a gravity ship I had convinced Bulma to 'let me borrow.' She told me I had to give it back after the tournament, but that wasn't going to happen. Not unless Dr. Briefs came up with an update vision.

_Three._ Since I wasn't on great terms with Vegeta after we got into fight during my first month on earth and Goku had to pry off of Vegeta before I ripped his head off, so there was no way I would be able to train at Capsule Corp. Mainly because I was still banished from there for two more months. Not that I would have gone back anyway.

_Four._ Anyway, Gohan had walked onto the ship, completely interrupting my training, and asked me if I would be interesting in babysitting. I had no idea what he had been talking about and asked why he would want me to sit on a baby.

_Five._ Gohan had explained that it had nothing to do with its title and that I would just be watching Pan while he and Videl had a date night.

_Six._ The next thing I knew I was at Gohan's house and Pan wanted to play every game under the moon.

_Seven_. I had refused her, and went out to the back yard to train some more. That's when Pan told me about this training exercise that was supposed to enhance my sensing skills and improve my awareness.

_Eight. _I hadn't realized that it was Pan's clever plan to get me to play with her. _Nine._

I opened my eyes, "Ten."

Pan was gone, hidden among the vast forest. First I searched for her energy, but Pan had been doing this longer then me and could hid better. I couldn't sense anything. Little did she know that tracking was one of the first skills I ever learned. I dropped my gaze to the ground.

I saw the bigger boot prints that where mine, and the little ones that belonged to Pan. I found the tracts with the most blowback that indicated her running away from me and then launching into the air leading to the right. I'd check in that direction first.

I rose into the air and drifted forward slowly, looking for any indication of where Pan might be while keeping a feel for her energy. I didn't see anything so I dropped lower until I was under the tree line. I floated low to the ground until I found a small footprint. I smiled when I found another one and fallowed it.

I had gone maybe a mile when I could finally feel her energy. As fast as I could I hurried toward her. I was almost there when screams caught me off guard and I slid to a stop.

"Lost!" It was Pan voice, "Lost, help me!"

I flew as fast as I could. I rocked out from behind a bush into a clearing where Pan was standing. I dropped to the ground and ran over to her. She didn't turn to look at me. I grabbed hold of her shoulder and spun her around so I could look her up and down.

"What is it Pan?" I asked, she wasn't in any kind of danger, "What happened?"

Pan pointed across the clearing to were a baby Brachiosaurus dinosaur was lying. Its leg was injured and a small pool of blood was staining the grass around it. The baby moaned and tried to stand, but soon collapsed back on the ground because it was unable to support its weight.

"This is why you called me?" I said, looking at Pan annoyed, "It's just a dinosaur!"

"He's hurt!" Pan said, "We have to help him!"

"Pan," I said slowly, "We can't help it. He's dying."

"But you can save it!" Pan said. She looked on the brink of tears. "I've seen how badly you get hurt when you training. I know you can! Please!"

I sighed, "Fine, okay? You just better not start crying or anything."

I got up and head over to the dinosaur. It flinched, looking up at me with wide, scared eyes. I pressed my hand into its neck to keep it still. I examined the cut on its leg. It wasn't too deep, I could easily mend it. I turned around to Pan.

"He needs water," I said.

Pan nodded and ran off into the woods. I didn't know if there was any water around, so I had to work quickly before she got back. I didn't want her to see this.

I gathered up wood that would easily burn and a rock as wide as the cut on the baby's leg and long enough that I wouldn't get burnt. I started a fire and held the rock over it until it was red hot. I turned back to the dinosaur and pressed my knee into its side holding him in place.

"This is going to hurt," I said, looking the thing in the eye, "But you need to stay still."

The dinosaur only blinked at me. I sighed and took the rock out of the fire and pressed it against the cut. The baby cried out in pain and wiggled underneath me, trying to get free. I didn't budge until the cut was completely cauterized. I tossed the rock to the ground and moved away from the dinosaur just as Pan came running back to me.

"I heard him crying!" Pan yelled. She was holding a hollowed out piece of wood. She dropped to her knees in front of the baby and I could see water in the bowl. "What did you do to him?"

"I stopped the bleeding," I said.

I stood and put out the fire. Then I gathered sap from the trees and a hand full of leaves. While Pan gave the dinosaur its water I bandaged his leg. The leaves would fall away as the dinosaur heeled.

I turned to Pan, "He'll be okay now. He just need to heel."

Pan threw herself into my arms, wrapping her hands around my neck. I stood there, with my arms at my sides, not sure what I was supposed to be doing with them

"Thank you for saving him," Pan whispered in my ear.

"Sure," I said, before pushing the kid away, "It's getting late. We should-"

My words where cut off by the mighty roar of the mama Brachiosaurus as she came smashing out of the trees. I pushed Pan behind me as I backed away from the baby until we were on the other side of the clearing. The mama stopped by her baby and sniffed him. The baby moaned, but was able to lift himself to his feet. The mama gave us one last look, before her and her baby disappeared back into the woods.

Pan took hold of my hand and squeezed it, "See that? You did that."

I rolled my eyes, "Come on. It's time to go home."

"But we never finished our game!" Pan protested.

I raised the hand that she was still gripping, "Tag."

Pan groaned and released my hand, "I challenge you to a rematch!"

I rose a few feet off the ground, "Maybe another time. I'll race you home."

Pan smiled and launched into the air, she didn't even pause to see if I was fallowing her. I took off after her with a smile on my face. It was easy to catch up to Pan, but I allowed her to stay ahead of me. When we were almost back to Gohan's house I speed up until we were neck to neck. Then, right before the house came into view I speed up more and beat Pan.

I landed in front of the door just seconds before Pan. She groaned and pushed me in the stomach, forcing me to take a step back. She said, "I'm the kid! You're supposed to let me win!"

I blinked at her, "How would you get better if everything was just given to you?"

"I don't wanna get better," Pan said moving past me to the front door, "I wanna win!"

As Pan opened the door and headed inside, I said, "Then you need to get better."

"Finally!" Both Pan and I jumped as Videl came running over to us and picked Pan up into her arms and holding her tight. She glared at me, "Pan is filthy, what have you been doing?"

"It's not her fault, mom," Pan said, "We went to the woods to play Hide n' Seek."

Videl put Pan down and continued to glare at me, "I'm tired of everyone telling me it's not your fault. You took my daughter out of the house and didn't leave a note telling us were you were going. Do you know how worried I've been?"

I turned my head to the side and narrowed my eyes, "No, why don't you tell me?"

"That's it!" Videl took a step forward, rising her fist, "I told Gohan it was a bad idea to let you watch Pan!"

"Obviously not too bad," I said crossing my arms over my chest, "Since the kid is still alive!"

"That's not the point!" Videl said, "You practically kidnapped her!"

That was going too far. Before I could stop myself I punched Videl across the face knocking her backwards. She crashed to the floor in a heap. I walked over to Videl and glared down at her.

"I would _never_ kidnap anyone!" I yelled.

"Lost you need to stop," Pan yelled, "Please!"

I straighten up and took a deep, calming breath. I turned on my heels and left, not even pausing to say goodbye to Pan. I walked outside and took off into the air. I didn't get to far when Gohan called out my name. I slowed to a stop and turned to look at him.

It was still strange for me to think of him as my brother. A huge part of me still felt like I had no blood family. After a year of being a part of his life, he was still a stranger. Goten would say I wasn't trying hard enough to get to know him. Then again you could say that about anyone I talked to.

"Where's Pan?" He asked.

"Picking Videl up off the floor is my guess," I said.

Gohan sighed and shook his head, "Lost, what did you do? Where have you been?"

"I didn't _do_ anything!" I yelled, "Pan wanted to play a game so we went to the woods! There she found a stupid dinosaur she wanted me to fix. So. I. Did! Then I bring her home safe and sound and Videl accuses me of kidnapping her! KIDNAPPING!"

I yelled. My energy level started to shoot higher and higher. I was so mad. I wanted to go back and rip Videl's head off. I wanted to set fire to everything and just watch it all burn. I clutched my fist tightly until my fingernails dug into my skin, causing blood to drip from my palms. I blew out a long breath between clenched teeth, and let my energy level return to normal.

Gohan stood before me, unaffected by my outburst. This wasn't the first time I had lost control, and Vegeta had paid the price. He said, "Feel better?"

"No!" I growled. I turned my head, looking at nothing in particular. "I would never kidnap anyone."

"I know," Gohan said floating over to me. He gently put his hand on my arm. "Videl knows that. She was just worried."

"Why?" I asked throwing my arms into the air, "Pan can take care of herself!"

"She's a mom," Gohan shrugged like that explained everything.

I shook my head, "Whatever. I'm going home now."

Gohan smiled at my use of the word home and said, "Wait, it's traditional for the babysitter to get paid."

"Paid with what?" I asked as Gohan dug around in the back pocket of his business pants.

He pulled out fifty Zeni and held it out to me, "With this."

I took the money and looked it up and down, and then turned it over in my palm. I looked back at Gohan and said, "What am I supposed to do with it?"

Gohan shrugged, "Buy something."

Gohan patted my shoulder then said goodbye. He turned and headed toward his house. I turned and headed to mine.

What was I supposed to by with money? Chi-Chi provided me with a place to sleep and food. I had my fighting uniform so I didn't need any clothes. I sure as hell wasn't going to by books and I had my own gravity room. What could I possibly need?

"My own house," I whispered to myself.

My own place far from Chi-Chi and her constant pestering about me going to school and getting married. Someplace where I didn't have to pretend to be something I'm not. I needed a place I could just train and be left alone.

I tucked the money into the pocket of my cargo pants and picked up speed. I was going to join the tournament just to be in a real fight again. I had no interest in the prize money, but now I did. Weirdly enough, the thought of peace was propelling me forward.

I landed in the clearing in front of the Son household and looked around. I remembered the first day I had seen this place like it was yesterday. I had come here to kill Goku, only to find out that he was my father. I had turned on my leader, Bunka, and killed him and myself at the same time.

Goten and some of the others chose to believe I sacrificed myself to save them and the world, but only Goku knew the truth. I wasn't about to allow Bunka to take my life like he had taken everything else from me. If death was the cost, I was willing to pay it.

I closed my eyes. Bunka had wanted me to kill Goku as revenge for when they had fought and Bunka had lost. So he had kidnapped me, raised me to be just as cruel and evil as him, and then released me on earth. After his death, Goku had wished me back to life using the dragon balls. I was in his debt.

Needless to say, I didn't finish the job Bunka had given me. Not that I hadn't thought about it. Many, many times over the past year, but I didn't want to be what Bunka made me. I wanted to try and be what Goku wanted me to. It wasn't easy. When it got too hard, I would tell myself a life for a life. Goku spared mine, so I shall spare theirs.

I took a deep breath and turned back to the little house that had became my home. I walked across the green grass and pushed open the door. Only Goku and Chi-Chi were still awake, gathered around the dining table and drinking tea. Goten's bed time had long since passed.

When I entered the house Goku and Chi-Chi smiled at me. Goku said, "How was babysitting?"

I slid my hands into the front pockets of my pants and headed over to the table with my head held high, "Well, I learned to play a game, I saved a baby dinosaur, I later punched Videl in the face, and then Gohan paid me. So, I'd say it was a pretty good night."

Goku and Chi-Chi shared a look. Chi-Chi said, "You punched Videl?"

"In the face?" Goku finished.

I nodded, "She's lucky that's all I did." I gave them a smile, "Nigh, all."

I turned on my heels and headed to the room I shared with Goten. I kicked off my boots by the door and padded across the floor to my bed. Goten had told me that this was once the bed of Gohan, before he had moved out to live with Videl. This information was virtually useless to me and I wasn't sure why Goten had told me about it.

I shook my head and glanced at Goten fast asleep in his bed. He looked half dead, with his body tossed in an askew angle and the blanket hanging off the corner of the mattress. I smiled and crawled under my own sheets.

I closed my eyes and my thoughts filled with visions of the tournament.


	2. Chapter 2: The World Tournament

**Chapter Two**

**The World Tournament**

I stared down at the new fighting uniform Chi-Chi had laid out for me while I was bathing. It was a light red dress, the same color as Goku's, which would fall to about mid thigh. She had also gotten me blue under armor to wear beneath it that Goten had informed me was the traditionally Saiyan fighting suit refitted for me by Bulma, with leggings a few inches longer then the dress and sleeves just wide enough to cover my shoulders. On the back of the dress, taking up a large amount of space, was Goku's symbol.

I rolled my eyes and stared down at my old uniform. It was practically falling apart, with patches and rips in the fabric. I had tried to fix it many times, but there was only so much the clothes could take. It's not surprising that Chi-Chi would make me new clothes, but did she have to make it so I looked like the female vision of Goku?

I pressed my lips together and stripped tossed my old clothes into a pile on the floor and then slipped into my new attire. With a deep breath I stepped in front of a full length mirror. I gasped at my reflection, despite myself.

For the first time ever I could actually see Goku in me. Not so much in the face, where I had Chi-Chi's jaw line and eyes, but in my overall presence. That is where Goku was. He was the strongest part of me. I just need to have faith that it would be enough.

I shook my head. What was I freaking talking about? I didn't need faith I needed strength. I gazed at my reflection with disgust. I was wearing a dress, for crying out loud! I never ever wore dresses. I never had a need for them before. And now I was going to be fighting in one? Oh, how far I have fallen.

I turned away from the mirror and moved to grab my boots from where I left them on the floor, but they were gone. In their place was a clean, new pair of boots that just happened to look like Goku's. On top of them was a pair of white, fingerless gloves which were similar to the ones I had seen Vegeta wearing. Jeez, I'd be the walking, talking, earthling-Saiyan half-breed model.

I slipped on the boots and then the gloves. I stared at my hands a few seconds, flexing my fingers. I pumped my arms, punching the air, and the twirled and dished out a few kicks. I did a back flip before jumping into the air a hovering few feet off the ground. I might feel silly fighting in a dress, but at least it was made of strong, breathable material.

I lowered myself back down to the floor and headed out to the living room where Goten and Goku were eating at the table and Chi-Chi was in the kitchen preparing even more food. Goku was dressed in his usual fighting gear, and Goten was dressed the same. My eyes widened when I noticed that even Chi-Chi was wearing a light red dress. We were all matching, like a perfect little family. I hoped that Gohan, Videl, and Pan weren't in on this.

They all paused as I pulled back one of the dining chairs and sat down. I ignored their looks of admiration as I grabbed a plate and started loading it with food.

"I like it," Goku said to me as he pushed a bowl of rice my way, "It suits you."

"Because I look like you," I mumbled. I dumped a pile of rice onto my plate and reached for a bowl of vegetables.

"I think you look so beautiful," Chi-Chi said coming to stand beside me. She gently ran her hand threw my hair. I hadn't kept it as short as I usually did and now it was falling past my shoulders, "Would you like me to pin this up for you?"

"No," I said around a bite of rice, "If you could just cut it all off, that'd be great."

"I can do that," Chi-Chi said and kissed the top of my head. She sat down at the table.

Fifteen years of torture had made it so that I hated to be touched in anyway, but after a year with the Son family I wasn't as uptight when it came to hugs and kisses as I had been. Mostly because Chi-Chi had found any excuse she could to pat my arm or tuck my hair behind my ear. Goku was the same way. Always pulling me into a one armed hug or ruffling my hair. Only Goten and Gohan didn't seem to always have to reassure me with hugs, though Pan constantly wanted to hold my hand.

"Do you need us to go over the rules of the tournament again?" Chi-Chi asked as she started eating her own food.

"Ah, come on, Mom!" Goten said, "We've gone over them ever night for a month! I think Lost gets it!"

"I'm pretty sure I can recite the rules in my sleep," I agreed. I took a bite of bread and gave a short nod, "In fact, I think I was dreaming about the rules last night."

Goku and Goten laughed, but Chi-Chi gave me a stern look and said, "I just don't want another event like last month happening, or the month before that, or-"

"I get it," I said raising my hand to silence her, "I'll control my temper."

At least once a month I would get mad enough that someone would get hurt. Last month I had almost dropped kicked Marron off the Lookout for hitting me in the back of the head with a rock when she had been aiming for Trunks. Before that I had broken Goten's arm while we were training. I hadn't meant to do it and I'd gotten him to Dende so it could be fixed, I just wanted to win and losing was never an option. The kid had forgiven me, but Chi-Chi hadn't.

Since then, Chi-Chi wanted to make sure that I wasn't going to accidently kill anyone during the tournament. It would be hard not to, which was why I planned to beat everyone as soon as possible and just move on to the next guy until I'm champion.

I cleared my throat, "So, is there a reason we are all dressed the same?"

Chi-Chi smiled, "I wanted us to look like a family."

"Because we look nothing a like," I mumbled, "And Gohan will be dressed like us too?"

"I'm not sure," Chi-Chi said staring off into space, "I talked to him about it, but I think he and Videl will be wearing their own thing."

_Lucky them_, I thought. Out loud I said, "So, we have all eaten. Can we go now?"

"Honey, the tournament doesn't start for another couple of hours," Chi-Chi said with a smile, "Besides I still need to cut your hair."

Chi-Chi hopped out of her chair and hurried off to get the scissors. I dropped my head to the table, causing the piles of dirty dishes to rattle. "Why couldn't I get hair there never grows," I mumbled.

Goku chuckled, "I don't know." He leaned back in his chair and rubbed his stomach and smiled, "At least you got my appetite."

Goten chuckled and I rose my head from the table. I said, "Hilarious."

"Okay, baby," Chi-Chi said returning with a towel and a pair of haircutters, "How short do you want it?"

I leaned back in my seat as Chi-Chi wrapped the towel around my neck. I said, "Boy short."

Chi-Chi cut nearly twelve inches of hair off my head while Goku continued to stuff his face and Goten talked on the phone. He kept blushing and saying cheesy lines, so I assumed he wasn't talking to Trunks. I didn't know he had a girlfriend, but then again Goten talked to a lot of girls. I sat, tapping my foot and watching as the time ticked by until it was finally time to go.

Much to my disappointment, Chi-Chi insisted that we all pile into her car and _drive_ to the island where the tournament was being held instead of just flying. I crammed into the backseat with Goten while Goku drove and Chi-Chi blabbered on and on about how nice it was to do things as a family. It was the same speech she had given whenever we did anything together. I had gotten really good at tuning her out.

We couldn't have arrived on location fast enough and I quickly scrambled out of the car and stretched my arms and legs.

"Jeez," Goku said giving me his big, genuine smile, "You'd think you were locked in a tiny box."

"I was," I mumbled and continued stretching.

Goku walked over to me and ruffled my hair, a few cut strands fell to my shirt. I ducked under his hand and headed across the parking lot which was filled with people. I quickly found the gate to enter the tournament grounds when someone grabbed my hand and pulled me to a sudden stop.

I turned to see Pan grinning up at me. She said, "Didn't you hear me calling you?"

"No," I said. I started walking toward the gate again, dragging Pan behind me.

Pan yanked me to a stop, "Don't you want to see Daddy?"

"No," I repeated and tried to shake the girls grip free, but she didn't budge.

"To bad," Pan said as she tried to pull me back the way I came, "He thinks you should apologize to Mommy. I like your hair cut, but the way."

I grabbed Pan around the waist, causing her spring dress to bunch together, and pulled her into the air severing her grip on my hand and put her down again. I knelt down to her level and looked her in the eye.

I said, "I'm not saying sorry to Videl until she says sorry to me." That was even if I could muster up an apology in the first place. I couldn't remember a time I had ever said I was sorry.

"You're the one who hit her," Pan said crossing her hands over her chest.

I decided that instead of fighting with her, I was just going to change the subjected. I said, "Are you fighting in the tournament this year?"

It worked like a charm. Pan's face instantly became frustrated and she glared at me. Her little hands tightened into fist and her shoulders hunched. She said, "No! Mom says that five is too young to fight with the adults, but I think she just doesn't want me to get hurt! I can take care of myself!"

I nodded my head and stood up, crossing my arms in front of me, "I agree. If you can walk you can fight."

"Exactly," Pan yelled throwing her hands in the air, "But Mom won't listen and Dad just agrees with everything she says!"

Someone wrapped their arm around my shoulders and I turned my head to see Stone grinning down at Pan. The other girl leaned forward, causing me to lean as well, as she looked into Pan's big eyes. Stone said, "Isn't that just like boys?"

Pan nodded crazily, "It is!"

Stone smiled and I straightened up causing her to do the same. Stone gave me her sweet grin and hugged me against her. I kept my arms cross and pulled away. Stone's smile didn't falter.

She patted me on the shoulder and said, "How's it going, babe?"

"It would be going better if people would let me into the tournament," I growled.

"Jeez," Stone said with an eye roll, "I haven't seen you in a whole twenty-four hours and all you have to say to me is blah, blah, tournament, blah, blah? We really need to get you a hobby!"

"I have one!" I said. I turned around and almost ran into Jun. "Seriously, do you guys just pop out of the ground?"

Stone leaned one hand against my shoulder, using me to support her weight, "Yeah! See, what you don't know is Jun's people are half gopher!"

"Very funny, Stone," Jun said glaring at the redhead girl before smiling at me. "Hey, you look good."

I nodded my hello back and ignored the complement. Stone and Jun were also members of my old team Bunka called the Force, along with a man named Gyou and someone named Kabuto who I had killed. Though Jun and Stone had mostly stayed by my side for the past year, Stone had moved to West City and gotten a job in a hospital. Jun roomed with her but spent as much time as he could at the Son household training with me or trying to get me to participate in family events. Gyou on the other hand had gotten married and moved to South City where his wife is three months pregnant, or at least that's what Stone tells me.

Stone was a few inches taller than me, with red hair and grass green eyes. She was dressed in a dark green fighting suit and her hair was pulled back into a tight bun on the top of her head. While Jun was dressed in his familiar black fighting suit he used to wear when he and I were in Bunka's army. His white hair was cut shorter than then mine and stuck up at odd angels.

"I'm going inside now," I said and started walking toward the gate again, only to once again be pulled to a stop by Pan.

"We have to wait for Grandma and Grandpa!" She said staring back in the direction where the rest of our family stood.

I fallowed Pan's gaze a saw that Krillin and 18 had joined Goku, along with their young daughter Marron. Several feet away were Vegeta, Bulma and Trunks were chatting up Goten. And of course Videl and Gohan were there. Gohan was paying me no mind as he laughed about something he and Goku were talking about, but Videl was watching me with narrowed eyes. There wasn't a whelp on her face from my punch, so they must have had her healed.

I turned away from them and stared at the moving crowed, longing to fallow them. I was so ready for a good fight, more than ready. This is the only time I could really push my opponents to the edge. Goku and my brothers would hold back, but not Vegeta or Videl. Only Vegeta would be the fun challenge.

"Bored?" Jun asked standing next to me. He gave me a cricked grin and knocked his shoulder against mine, "Maybe you should practices meditation."

"Maybe we should do a warm-up round," I suggested.

"Against you?" Jun shook his head, "I'd probably die."

"I'd never kill you," I said. Jun game me a weird look. I asked, "What?"

Jun shrugged, "Nothing."

I opened my mouth to reply but Goten and Trunks came running over. Goten said, "Okay, Lost, everyone in heading inside now."

"It's about time!" I said and fell into step with the rest of the people heading inside the gate. My stride was fast as I hurried along.

Goku fell into step beside me and put his hand on my shoulder to slow me down. He said, "Getting inside isn't going to make the fighting start any sooner."

I sighed and slowed my steps. Over the past year Goku had gone out of his way to spend time with me. Goku would train me, take me fishing, and introduced me to a number of amazing tasting foods, but we still weren't close. He would talk, telling me about all the things I had missed out since I'd been gone, but I hadn't been able to talk back. Though Stone and Jun had told the others stories, I didn't want my family to know the things I had done in my past.

Once inside the main building we fell into line with the other hundred hopefuls to register for the tournament. One small step at a time we moved forward. I took this time to take in all my possible opponents and sized up their energies. Besides my own group, everyone was less the superior humans that even Marron could beat.

"This is stupid," I said as I took a step forward. "We shouldn't have to fight the humans. It's not like they have a chance of winning anyway. Why don't we start our own tournament? We can call it the Saiyan Games."

"You would think she was Vegeta's daughter with the way she things," Bulma said.

Vegeta scoffed, "Like a true Saiyan."

Some of the others chucked, but I remained silent with my eyes focused straight ahead. Neither Vegeta nor I had made eye contact, like that alone would spark a fight. It probably would, since you could cut the tension between us with a knife.

We all finally registered for the fight and where sent to an area where we had to get in yet another line so we could punch a machine that measured our strength and told us rather or not we would be in the tournament. It was here that we met up with Piccolo.

"Remember to not break the machine," Goku said eyeing me and then Vegeta, "We know we are all powerful enough to do that, but go easy on it anyway."

I nodded and Vegeta rolled his eyes. I shook my head at him, but kept from smacking him on the back of his head.

The fighters included me, Goku, Jun, Stone, Goten, Gohan, Vegeta, Videl, Piccolo, Trunks, 18, Krillin and Mr. Satan. I still wasn't sure how that happened since he hadn't even needed to punch anything. The last three opponents were humans named Lockwood, Masked Demand, and Taka.

Once that was decided some of the staff cleared out the unworthy fighters and the punching machine and rolled in a small table that had a small box on top of it and a white board with a layout of how the fight will go. The announcer, an older man with grey hair and a dark suit, stepped up holding a clipboard.

"When I call your name," The announcer called, pressing his dark sunglasses up his nose, "Step forward and draw a ball from the box. Each ball has a number that we tell you who will be fighting who and when. First up is Android 18!"

18 stepped forward and made her way to the table. She said her hand into the box and withdrew a little white ball. She handed it to one of the staff members. As she returned to her husband's side, the staff member wrote her name under the number seven.

"Right," The announcer said turning back to his clipboard, "Gohan!"

Gohan drew his ball and his name was written under the five. Goku was number nine and Goten was number eleven. When it came time for Mr. Satan to draw the announcer did it for him and he was number twelve, which meant he would be fighting Goten in the first round. Jun drew the eight ball so he would be fighting 18. Krillin got the sixteenth ball and the man named Lockwood got the second ball.

"Lost," The announcer called.

I stepped up and with drew my own ball. I turned it over in my hands until the black numbers were face up. I got the fifteenth ball and would be fighting Krillin in the first round. I was a little disappointed that my first challenger wasn't going to be more of a challenge, but at least I was going to fight. I gave the staff member my ball and rejoined the others.

As my name was written by Krillin's he said, "Man, I was really hoping to make it to the second round!" Rubbing the back of his head he came wondering over to me. Krillin had let his hair grow out over the past year and now he looked a little weird with a bunch of black hair sitting on his head. He smiled at me and held out his hand, "Hey, Lost, why don't you take it easy on me, okay?"

I smiled, "No promises."

The Masked Demand's name was called next and he thirteenth. Piccolo got four, and Stone was pitted against Goku when she drew the number ten. The man named Taka was matched against Masked Demand, Trunks would be fighting Gohan, and Vegeta would be fighting Lockwood, which left Videl to fight Piccolo.

I stared at the white bored and my gaze drifted to my name. The matches have been chosen and soon the fighting will finally begin.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

**Round One**

I tapped my foot impatiently against the tiled floor of the waiting room as we all prepared for the fighting to start, which wouldn't happen for another forty five minutes. The others were stretching, chatting, or standing in the corner and glaring. I stood with my arms crossed and my eyes focused at the arena, anticipating how the matches would go. My assumption was that I would be fighting Goku by the third round.

It felt way too far away. I groaned and dropped my head. I really needed something to take the edge off. There had to be something I could do. I could join Goku when he went to the dining area and stuff my face full of all kinds of delicious foods that I didn't need to know the name of, but really food didn't appeal to me right now.

"Calm down, Lost," Jun said as he placed his hand on my shoulder and turned me way from the ring. "Why do you want to fight so bad anyway?"

"I don't know," I admitted. I walked away from him and leaned against the nearest wall, "It's like I have an itch and I need to scratch it."

"The more you scratch, the more it'll itch," Jun pointed out. He ran his hand thought his hair and sighed, "I don't think we are allowed to fight each other before the tournament begins but maybe a little warm up will help you relax."

I pulled away from the wall and eyed him, "Really?"

I was so ready for a fight I could have jumped in the air with glee. My blood started pumping hard in my ears and my muscles tightened in the familiar eagerness for battle. My Saiyan blood rejoiced and pushed me forward.

I grabbed Jun by the hand and started running, heading out of the waiting area. I heard Stone laughing as she called, "You two better not be getting into any trouble, you hear!"

Jun blushed but I disregarded her. I ran down the hall to the newly installed gym. To my shock the place was completely empty. Everyone must have been resting up for the fights. I released my hold on Jun's hand and made my way over to a large blue wrestling mat that was located in the center of the room. I walked to the middle and turned to face Jun. He was watching me with a lopsided grin.

"What?" I asked, "Why do you always look at me like that before we start training?"

"Because I love the way you look right before you fight," Jun said, "You're face glows and there is pure joy in your eyes. You always look breathtaking."

"Obviously not that breathtaking if you can still talk," I mumbled.

Jun moved to stand in front of me and he stared down at me with dark blue eyes. I remembered the first time I had seen those eyes as the memory flashed unwanted through my mind.

Jun's home planet was made of ice and covered in snow. The cities were made of crystal rock that reflected the color of the sun causing them to appear on fire. I had never been so cold and amazed at the same time.

Jun's father was the Commander of the army and had greeted Bunka and me as we arrived. Though the people had shown no sign of aggression toward us we attacked, destroying the army and the Commander. As the city burned and the ice melted around us, I turned toward the center of the city and there stood Jun.

He had been dressed in the traditional blue army uniform of his people, which was just slightly too big for his slim frame. Jun stood before us as a lone warrior against a force he couldn't possibly beat. Behind him stood an older woman and a ten year old girl, cowering from us like cockroaches from light. It was only later that I learned that they were Jun's mother and sister.

Bunka had admired Jun's courage and offered him a place on the Force in exchange for his family's safety. Jun had agreed, but Bunka had ordered me to kill the mother and daughter anyway. I hesitated, a mistake I was later punished for. Kabuto was the one to end their lives and dragged a fighting Jun away.

Since then Jun's eyes had turned the color of blue ice, only to turn to vibrant cobalt when he was remembering his family or looking at me. His eyes were so blue I felt like I might drown in them. I quickly turned away.

I pulled my ankle up to my butt to stretch my quad. I said, "Flattery will not keep me from beating you."

"I wasn't doing it to win," Jun said calmly behind me. There was a tone in his voice that told me there was a deeper meaning to his words.

I turned my head back around to look him in the eye, and dropped my foot back to the floor. I asked, "What's that supposed to mean?"

"I joined the tournament for you," Jun said softly, his whole body seemed to soften, which was wired because he had put on more muscle over the past year then I had. "So I could be close to you."

"We train every day," I said. What was he talking about? I knew Jun had feelings for me. Did that have anything to do with his crazy talk? It seemed his feelings always seemed to make him a little weird.

"Yes," Jun said taking a step forward, "but I want to spend more time with you. I want you to be with me every minute of every day."

I blinked at him, confused. I said, "Your apartment only has two rooms, how would I fit in there?"

"By sharing a room," Jun said, giving me a pointed look.

"I already share a room," I said, "Besides I'm going to buy a house with the money I win today so I don't have to move in with you and Stone.""

"You're… gunna buy a house?" Jun asked, "Here on earth?"

I nodded, "Was there some other planet you had in mind?"

"No," Jun said with a shake of his head, "I just never thought you would be interested in settling down here."

"Well, I am," I said, "Now, let's warm up. We only have half an hour left till its game time."

"Right," Jun said sliding into his fighting posture. "Bring it, kid."

I smiled, lowering myself into a fighting stance. We had been training together for two years. I knew his fighting style just as he knew mine. Jun even knew each of the techniques that Goku had taught me while I was training with him and Goten. The only advantage I had on Jun was that I was stronger. We hadn't done a full blown to-the-death fight since I arrived on earth, but I looked forward to it in the arena, if it came to that.

Just as we were about to fight some called, "No fighting!" I turned to see one of the short, chubby staff members hurrying over to us, "There is no fighting between opponents while in the tournament!"

"We weren't going to fight," Jun insisted, "We were just going to warm up."

"I'm sorry," the staff member said, "But any fighting between opponents is an automatic disqualification."

I sighed, "All right, fine. Whatever, we won't warm up."

The staff member nodded at me and begun retreating out of the room. I hadn't realized I was glaring until I noticed the look of fear on his face. Once the man was out of the room and the door was shut, I collapsed on the ground. Lying on my back and staring up at the ceiling.

"How do I do that meditation thing?" I asked, not looking at Jun.

I heard him padding across the training mat as he came to lie beside me. He laid down so that he was facing me, and propped up on his elbow. He said, "Slow deep breaths and calming thoughts."

I closed my eyes and breathed in until my lungs where fully extended, I held the breath until it hurt before slowly blowing it out, "Calm, calm, calm. It's not working."

Jun stated laughing and I found myself smiling. I opened my eyes to slits so that I could peek up at him. He was smiling at me. He said, "You're such a dork."

I rolled over, pushing him on to his back and straddling him. I pushed his shoulders into the mat and glared. I said, "Take that back!"

Jun's grin grew bigger and he shook his head, "Never!"

He grabbed hold of my elbow and rocked to the left, throwing me off balance. I slid to the right to regain control, but Jun rolled the same way causing me to fall off him. Jun continued to roll us until my back was pressed against the mat and he was on top of me. I struggled to push him off, but he held me against the ground and pinned my arms to my sides.

Jun pressed his lips against mine suddenly. At first I was too surprised to react to his lips moving against mine. He moved one hand to my hip, and buried the other one in my hair. My arms kind of just floated between touching his back and lying useless on the ground. I didn't know what I was supposed to do with them. I wasn't sure what to do in response to the kiss.

A part of me felt like he was too close, but the other half felt like he wasn't close enough. I wanted to push him away while at the same time I wanted to hold him. I couldn't decide which half to listen to so I deiced to make it stop.

I turned my head to the side, breaking the kiss. When Jun pulled away to look at me, I head butted him in the nose. Jun rolled off me and I quickly rose to my feet, pressing my finger tips to my lips and turning to face him. My mouth felt hot and swollen from the kiss.

"What was that for?" Jun asked. He whipped a stray drop of blood from his nose.

"Right back at you," I said.

"It was called a kiss, Lost," Jun informed me.

"I know what it's called!" I said, "Why did you do it?"

"I don't know," Jun said getting to his feet, "It was an accident."

"What, your lips just fell on mine and gravity kept you from lifting your head?" I asked. I put my hands on my hips.

"No," Jun said with an exasperated sigh, "I mean, I hadn't meant to do it. I just looked at you and before I knew it we were kissing."

"That doesn't make since, Jun!" I said.

Jun gave me a look like he thought I was being stupid, "I've already told you, Lost. I'm in love with you. Do you feel the same way about me?"

I opened my mouth to yell no, but then quickly closed it. Did I love him? I wasn't even sure what love felt like. I know I liked having him around. I thought about the first day I had come to earth. It was Jun that told me that I should give Goku a chance. Had I done that for Jun? I tried to think of an excuse of why _I_ would be so kind.

A day after deciding that I would remain on earth, Jun and I had been talking about how evil I could be after a long day of training. Somehow we had gotten onto the topic of rather or not I was still going to kill the others.

"Maybe I'll still kill Goku," I had said while sitting on the floor and stretching my hamstring.

"No you won't," Jun had replied without hesitation.

I had raised my brow, "How do you know?"

"Because you never desired to kill him, not since should up at his house," Jun had said without looking at me.

"What makes you think that?" I had asked. I had been annoyed with him. I felt like I would kill Goku just to prove that I would.

"Have you ever wondered why you can stand Pan but not Videl? Or why you take care of Goten, but fight with Trunks? Or why you put up with all of Chi-Chi's nagging?" Jun had asked, "You're one of the cruelest people I have ever met. I've seen you kill innocent men, women, and children. We've heard ever plea in the book, but some random guy claims to be you father and you give him a day?" Jun shook his head, "No. Subconsciously, I think you remembered Goku. With Goten, it was you big sister mood kicking in. Even if you hadn't killed Bunka, you never would have killed your family."

He had been right. I hadn't killed the others, I didn't want to. It was weird, considering the things I had done in the past. Did that mean I cared, maybe even loved them? I wasn't sure, and I wasn't sure how I felt about Jun.

I shrugged and said, "I don't know."

"That's okay," Jun said giving me a small smile, "I'm willing to wait. Maybe with a mother figure around now you'll better be able to understand what you're feeling."

"Mother figure?" I asked. It was the only part that stuck out to me. The rest of his words fading from my memory.

"Yes," Jun said, with a strange nod of his head, like he was almost regretted ever saying anything.

My brows pulled together in confusion. I waited for him to say something more but he remained silent, "Are you going to elaborate or keep me in suspense?"

"I just think you should spend more time with Bulma and Chi-Chi to show you what a woman is supposed to be like," Jun bit his tongue, "I mean, stop spending so much time training and spend more time doing normal things. Stone would be good at it to, but Bulma and Chi-Chi don't have that harden view of the world like she does."

"What kind of normal things?" I asked.

"Shopping and talking," Jun begun to list.

I glared and said, "Cleaning, cooking and taking care of you? Am I supposed to be you devoted wife?"

"What? No, that's not what I meant!" Jun's eyes widened, "Did you just say wife?"

I wanted to slap him in the face hard enough to send him though the wall, but instead I took a deep breath. I said, "If you'll excuse me, I have to go do manly stuff now."

I turned on my heels and stormed across the room. Jun called for me to wait, but I ignored him. I slammed the door shut behind me and headed back to the waiting area, itching even more for a fight. I didn't pause as I entered the waiting room and continued my attitude over to the entrance that led out to the arena. I stopped there, with my arms crossed and stared out at the crowd.

"What happened?" Goku asked, appearing at my elbow.

"Men are stupid!" I growled, not looking at him.

Goku's body tensed slightly, "What did Jun do? Did he… did he hurt you?"

I whipped my head around to stare up at him, "How could he hurt _me_? Jun is strong, but he's not that strong."

"There are other ways of being hurt," Goku explained coolly, "Like if he wounded your pride or said something that upset you emotionally."

I clenched and unclenched my jaw before turning back to the crowd. I said, "He was just being a jerk."

Goku hesitated for a moment before saying, "Do you want to talk about it?"

"Not really," I said, trying to do the meditation thing.

Goku put his hand on my shoulder and squeezed it reassuringly, "If you decide you want to, I'm here for you. Everything will be okay."

Goku left me then and the first round begun. Vegeta beat the Lockwood guy faster than I could blink. It was really pathetic. The fight between Piccolo and Videl lasted longer, almost half an hour. I think Piccolo wanted to allow Videl to appear as if she could win before he knocked her out of the ring. The fight between Gohan and Trunks was more intense, taking them all over the ring and high into the air. They moved so fast the crowed had a hard time fallowing them, but in the end Gohan was the winner.

The fight between Jun and 18 was the same. They were nearly equally matched in their strength. At first they seemed to just be playing, but the fight soon became more serious as they picked up speed.

"Wow," Gohan said, gapping at the two fighters, "I had no idea that Jun was that powerful!"

I gave him a questioning look, "Why not? He was one of Bunka's elite fighters."

"Yeah," Gohan said looking at me, "I guess I just never thought about it. He doesn't seem to really want to fight. I just figured he was the smart one, based on what you guys have told me."

"He is," Stone said, "Like Bulma smart, but that doesn't mean he's weak."

"Your right," Gohan said, returning his gaze to the fight just as Jun knocked 18 flat on her back outside of the ring.

I smiled, feeling pride and a little smug, as Jun lowered himself back to the center of the ring. The announcer called out that he was the winner and Jun walked back over to us. He took his rightful place at my side.

Although Stone was a talented fighter, much like Jun, she was no match for Goku. Still she strolled out of the waiting room with Goku at her side, with her head held high and a smile across her face. During the fight I could tell that Goku was allowing Stone to land hits, but the result was as I predicted. Stone was knocked out of the ring and Goku was victor. Stone lost with pride and thanked Goku for the fight.

The next two fights didn't last long. Goten beat Mr. Satan and the fighter Taka beat Masked Demand. It was finally time for Krillin and me to take the ring. When the announcer called our names, we walked side by side to the middle of the ring. To my right I could hear Chi-Chi cheering me on, telling me how I could win like I wasn't already obvious.

I smiled at Krillin and he smiled back. He said, "Can you at least make it look like I have a chance? For Marron's sake."

Considering that Marron and I weren't on good terms, this probably wasn't his most persuasive argument he could have done. I had a lot of pent up aggression I need to get out and I didn't want this fight to end quickly. I said, "If you give it all you got, I won't end this fast."

"Sounds good," Krillin said as he readying himself.

I rubbed my fingertips together in anticipation. Krillin pushed himself off the ground, launching himself at me and the fight begun. I kept my energy level equal with his to allow him to land punches and knock me down occasionally, but I also didn't hold back. It was a good fight, and it lasted until I was satisfied. I gave Krillin a quick punch to the jaw causing him to fly the side and stumbled out of the arena.

"The winner is… Lost!" the announcer called, pumping his fist into the air.

The crowd erupted into applaud as I made my way over to Krillin. He was rubbing his jaw at the edge of the ring. I offered my hand to him, and when he took it, I helped him back onto the ring. I tried to take my hand back, but Krillin started shaking it.

"Thanks," Krillin said before releasing my hand, "It was a good fight."

I smiled, "Thanks for not holding back."

Krillin raised his eyebrows, "Did you just thank me?"

I paused a moment to replay what I had said over. I turned away from Krillin and made my way back to the waiting area and called back, "I guess I did."

I was congratulated when I returned to the waiting room by my family, but I paid them no mind. There was no point in congratulating me when I already knew I was going to win. Instead I focused my attention on my next opponent.

Taka wasn't much to look at. He was tall with black hair and dark eyes. He was dressed in lose fitting fighting pants and a fitted shirt. The only thing about Taka that stood out to me was the weird looking bracelet he had on his right arm. It looked technological, but I couldn't imagine the tournament would allow outside technology into the fights. It didn't matter. Taka was the last thing standing before me and a true fight with Goku. I was going to end that match as I had with Krillin.

I turned to Goku. He smiled at me, thinking the same thing I was. The look in his eyes told me he was looking forward to our fight as much as I was. This was going to be fun.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

**An Offer You Can't Refuse**

Pan dropped down on the bench next to me, after she had snuck into the dining area with Stone and Videl to hang out while we had a quick snack before the next round of fights, if you could even call it a snack. Those of Saiyan blood were eating an elephant's weight in food each. I sat off to the side enjoying a bowl of rice, with Stone on the other side of me.

Pan had been insisting she should be able to fight, and Videl had told her no. Videl's excuse was that the fights had already started, but she was eyeing me when she said it so I knew I was the real reason. She didn't trust me to hold back, but I did just fine while fighting Krillin.

Still Pan pestered anyway, and I attempted to ignore her. It was hard to ignore Pan with her sitting so close that our arms brushed, and she kept sighing as loudly as she could every few seconds. I offered her my rice just to shut her up. The young girl took it greedily.

"I would thing that with the way she's always seems to glare at us," Videl whispered in Gohan's ear, "That physical contact would send her into uncontrollable spasms of disgust."

Gohan gave Videl a warning look and leaned to whisper something in her ear. Whatever it was, she wasn't happy about it. She turned her face to her food and didn't say anything more as she ate.

Videl and I had once tried to be friends, for Gohan and Pan mostly. After all she was my sister-in-law, but my temper and her take-no-shit attitude left us at a bit of an impasse when we were both to stubborn to back down. Typically we just ignored each other, but when Pan was hanging around me Videl acted like I planned to bring the kid over to the dark side and she lashed out.

I had hit Videl with a math book once when she told Gohan he was wasting his time trying to teach me to read after I threw a book through the window, and she thought I didn't have the capacity to sit there for hours to learn. Of course her comment only made me want to learn all the more and now I can read and write just as well as Goten. I'm even getting better at the more complicated math, though I really don't have the tolerance for it.

It's not that I didn't like Videl, or even cared what she thought of me. I just tended to act before I thought things through. I wasn't about to apologize for anything, and until I did, she wasn't going to be any nicer to me. That was fine with me. I didn't need another person telling me how I should act. Instead of hitting her this time, I stood up and left the room, with Pan hot on my heels.

I paused in the hallway and leaned against the wall, fighting to control my temper. All I could think was how I could send Videl's body into uncontrollable spasms with one blow to the right spot. Only Pan kept me from doing that, just as Goten had been the one to keep me from smacking Chi-Chi until I got used to her.

I smiled reassuringly at Pan, and she smiled back. Pan leaned against the wall beside me, taking up the same exact position as me, down to which direction my foot was pointing. I resisted the temptation to roll my eyes at her. Why she thought I was the person for her to look up to, I had no clue.

"Has anyone seen Lost?" My ears perked at Jun's words. There was a round of 'she just left' before Jun said, "Goku, I'd like to ask you for Lost's hand."

Did he just ask what I think he asked? I froze, my eyes going wide and I looked down at Pan. She gave me a funny look like she wasn't quite sure what was happening either. We turned our faces to the door at the same time to listen.

There was a commotion as a few people in the room gave disbelieving gasp, and I heard Stone laugh and call out, "Finally!"

"Um, wow," Goku said with an awestruck tone to his voice. I could picture him rubbing the back of his head as he stared down at Jun. "Of course, I guess. If you think you can get it."

"What?" I yelled. A horrified look crossed my face and I rounded the corner to look at Jun and Goku. They both looked up at me with wide eyed looks. Both looked guilty for being caught in the act. I said to Jun, "Why would you want my hand?" I turned to Goku, "And why would you give it to him?"

"No, Lost," Jun said, "I'm asking him if I can marry you."

I looked at him confused, "What does that have to do with my hand?"

"Bulma was wrong," Videl muttered, "She's more like Goku."

"It's a metaphor," Goten explained, "When you get married you get a ring on you left hand. So, he asked for your hand."

"Okay," I said, slightly uncertain, "Then why you ask Goku instead of me?"

"I was going to," Jun said, "On my planet it's customary to ask the father, before the daughter."

"That's just stupid," I said.

"Yes, it is," Stone said, "But that's not the point."

"What is the point?" I asked.

"The point is," Trunks said with an eye roll, like I was the stupidest person in the world, "Jun just asked you to marry him. Are you going to?"

Everyone's eyes turned to me. Even Vegeta and Piccolo were staring at me, and they never seemed interested in anything the group was talking about. I couldn't think of anything to say with all their eyes focused on me. I knew what marriage was, I wasn't that clueless, but that didn't mean I wanted to get married. I hadn't even thought about it since I told Chi-Chi it wasn't going to happen.

"No," I said.

Without glancing back I turned and left the room. I had no clue which way I was going. I just knew I couldn't stop. I slowly speed up to a run, the sound of my feet hitting the floor echoed around me. I jumped out the first window I came to and flew into the air, landing gracefully on the roof.

I took a deep breath, feeling my lungs with fresh air. I kept my lungs fully extended well past the point of pain before blowing out the air. I didn't want to admit it, but I was scared. Getting married, having children, creating a family. How could I be a wife? How could I be a mother? I couldn't. It wasn't in my nature to become Chi-Chi and spend all my time cooking and cleaning and taking care of my family. I just couldn't do it.

I collapsed against the roof, breathing hard and feeling pathetic. I banged my fist against the roof. What was wrong with me? Why couldn't I be that person? The idea of having my own child was so repulsive I could have thrown up. To bring a baby into a world where its mother didn't feel anything toward it was just wrong. All I would be able to do is train it and make it stronger. I wouldn't be its mother I'd be its teacher.

"Ah!" I slammed my fist into the roof again.

My Ki pulsed out around me, blowing several pieces of the roof into the air. The hovered around me as my power flowed stronger with my growing frustration and anger. I dug my finger tips into the wood, relishing the pain and trying to regain control before I blew this entire place away. I took another deep breath, and when I released it, I dropped by energy level back to normal.

"How's it going?" I jumped and looked up to find Gohan standing over me, "Your energy level has grown a lot since we first met."

"What do you want?" I snapped, ignoring his comment about my power. I dug the heels of my hands into the roof, feeling its sharp edges digging into my skin, and gave Gohan my best go-away glare.

Gohan sighed and crouched down beside me, unaffected, and said a little sarcastically, "I figured I'd try my hand at being the older brother and make sure you were okay."

I swallowed down the desire to punch him so hard that I broke his face. I shook my head, "Of course I'm fine!"

Gohan nodded, "'Cause you sure look like you're fine."

"So what if I'm not fine?" I asked, but my anger was quickly fading. It was replaced with growing confusion, "How is this possible? Why would he want to marry me?"

"Hasn't he told you?" Gohan asked. He leaned against the roof beside me, with his arms resting on his knees, and turned his head to look at me.

"Yes," I said, "But why would he want to marry _me_? It doesn't make any sense. I'm not the kind of person boys are supposed to fall in love with."

"Love's funny like that," he said, smiling at me, "Just look at Bulma and Vegeta. Besides, I think you're pretty great."

"I don't think it's funny at all," I mumbled. "And I'm not great. Not at this emotional junk."

Gohan laughed, "No, but life does. Look, you don't need to give Jun an answer yet. Take your time and _really_ thing about it. Think about everything, not just about become a wife, but also about how you feel about Jun and what you want to give him."

"Give him?" I asked, peaking at Gohan out of the corner of my eye.

"Yes," Gohan said, "Do you want to make him happy? Give him a family?"

"I can't be a mom," I replied dryly.

"I've seen you with Pan," Gohan said, "I think you'll be an amazing mother."

"I disagree," I said.

"There's more to a family then just being a mom," Gohan said softly. He bumped his shoulder against mine, and I looked up at him. "Just give it time. Things will work out in the end. It'll be okay, I promise."

"Ah-hem," Jun said as he peaked at us from the edge of the roof. All I could see of him was his eyes and white hair blowing in the wind. He grabbed the edge of the roof with his hands and inched a little higher so we could see his torso. Jun said, "Can I talk to Lost alone for a moment?"

Gohan turned to me and I nodded. Gohan gave a quick glance at Jun before he left. Jun took Gohan's spot next to me. We were quite for a moment, with me staring at the sky and Jun looking around the roof. Jun broke the silence by saying, "I wasn't going to ask you for a while. I'm not trying to rush this. I just wanted Goku to know that one day I was going to marry you."

"Not if I say no," I said sharply, "Which, if you didn't notice, I already did."

"Then I'll just have to tie you to log and force you to marry me," Jun said with a smile.

"That's not funny," I said, completely serious.

"Yeah," Jun dropped his head, but the smile didn't fade.

A flash of a memory shot across my mind. For a moment I could feel his lips on mine again. Heat once again rushed to my cheeks. I pressed my lips together and stared at him.

Jun was a very attractive man, and he'd make a great husband and father. He was twenty now, with strong features and he was more than capable of protecting those he loved. Jun was taller than me, but not as tall as Gohan and Goku. I'd seen may woman swoon for him while we were in the city. Woman much prettier than me, but Jun had never paid them any mind.

"Do you think I'm pretty?" I asked in one quick breath.

"I think you're beautiful," Jun said, brushing a stray bit of hair behind my ear, "Like the sun rise, or a rose."

"I don't think any of those things are beautiful," I said.

"Because you don't see them the way I do," Jun smiled at me, his thumb making small circles on my jaw line.

"You're a moron," I said, but my heart wasn't in the insult.

"I'll make you a deal," Jun said, "We'll wait a few more years. If you still don't want to marry me, fine. But if you do, then we'll get married."

"Fine, whatever," I said with a sigh, "You shouldn't love me, Jun."

Jun slid a little closer to me until our bodies were touching. He took my hand in his free one and leaned forward to kiss my cheek. More blood rushed to my face and I was sure I was as bright as a tomato. I felt warm all over, and it wasn't from the sun.

"Come on," Jun said. He stood, pulling me up with him. "The next fight will be starting soon."

Jun refused to release my hand as we returned to the waiting room where the last of the fighters had gathered. Stone wasn't there and I was glad. I didn't think I could put up with her crap about Jun asking me to marry him, though I knew I would get an earful later.

Gohan only nodded to me as we entered the room, and Goku was respectful and didn't approach the subject. Though I did see him notice our interlocked fingers. I could see that Goten was just itching to ask me questions, but he showed an amazing amount of restraint and only smiled at me.

"Your gunna get hurt, you know," I told Jun as he pulled me to the mouth of the waiting room so we could see the arena.

"Nice to know you have faith in me," Jun said, but he was smiling, "I'm still gunna fight Gohan with all I got."

"I'm not talking about the fight," I said, "I'm talking about me."

Jun took my face in his hand, holing my head up so I had to look him in the eye. He said, "No, I won't."

"You don't know that," I said.

Jun smiled and squeezed my hand, "Yes, I do."

Jun and I watched as the fight between Piccolo and Vegeta begun and nearly destroyed the arena. I never thought it would end, but Vegeta managed to catch Piccolo off guard and sent him crashing into the stands. The people on them managed to get out of the way just in time. The fight between Jun and Gohan was intense but in the end Gohan was the winner. When Goku and Goten took the arena the fight was just a game to them, but Goku won of course, even after Goten became a Super Saiyan.

Finally the announcer called my name, and then Taka's. Together we walked side by side to the middle of the arena. We stood facing each other, and I ready myself for the fight. I had no reason to draw this fight out. The faster it was over, the faster I would be able to fight Goku.

"I've been waiting for this for a while," Taka said.

The boy made no move to prepare for the fight. In fact, he didn't look like he intended to fight at all. He just stood a few feet away from me, looking at me so intensely he could have started a fire. It was almost unsettling.

"Waiting to fight me?" I asked.

"No," Taka said curtly, "To get this chance to talk to you, you where never alone before."

"Yeah," I said. Everyone seemed to need to at least keep one pair of eyes on me. The thought pissed me off. I didn't need a babysitter. "Why would you want to talk to me? I'm not throwing this fight."

"It's not that. I want to give you an offer," Taka said, "I've been watching you, just to make sure that you would be interested."

I rose out of my fighting stance. I looked at him confused, "You've been watching me? What kind of offer?"

"Uh," The announcer called over the microphone before Taka could answer, "The fight has started. You two can go at it anytime!"

"I wanted to make sure that you would take my offer," Taka said, ignoring the announcer. "The day in the woods with Pan, you would have left the dinosaur to die. Even though you didn't, that's when I knew. You are still emotionless, or at least enough."

I narrowed my eyes. He was in the woods and I had let Pan go flying off? I clenched my jaw. I hadn't even sensed him which meant he knew how to lower his power level. Who was this guy?

I said, "Why do you care if I did or didn't let a baby die?"

"I'm from the future, Lost," Taka said, "I have the power to travel backward and forward in time."

"Prove it," I said, folding my arms over my chest.

"Your real name is Airi," Taka said, "You were kidnapped by a man named Bunka for fifteen years. You killed one of you own teammates, who you knew for more than half your life, so he wouldn't tell Bunka you were coming for him."

"You did say you were watching me," I said, "You could have just picked that up from someone."

Taka shook his head, "My offer is this: if you kill the Z fighters and join with me to rule the world, I will take you back in time to where you were kidnapped. You can kill Bunka again and save yourself."

My mouth dropped open and all I could do was stare. His words raced through my mind, banging on my skull. This couldn't be real. I had to be dreaming.

_Kill the Z fighters._ Why would he want me to kill them? What future event would lead someone to want them dead? _A lot, actually._ The Z fighters were always thwarting the plans of evil master minds. So what happened to Taka to make him want them dead? He obviously believed he needed my help if he wanted to take over the world, so he couldn't do it on his own. That didn't explain why he would come back to _this_ time and ask me to join him.

_Kill Bunka_. Been there, done that.

_Save yourself._ This was what made it hard for me to turn down Taka's offer right then and there. Goten had told me about how a future version of Trunks had changed the past by traveling back in time to save the Z fighters. It was possible that time travel was still possible in the future. If I went back in time, my present wouldn't change. A new branch of time would be created, one where I had never been taken by Bunka in the first place. I couldn't deny that this sound good to me.

I didn't want my past self to go through the hell that I did. I wanted to save her, to save me. If all I had to do was kill the Z fighters, could I do it? Would it be worth it? Maybe, but then…

"Why would I join you?" I asked.

"You don't belong with them, Lost," Taka said, inching toward me. "You know it and I know it. Hell, they know it." Taka threw out his arm to indicate the others, "They're scared of you, because you're stronger than them. This isn't your world, you're not like Goku. You thirst for blood, you live for the kill. I will save your past, but give me your future."

"Give you my future?" I repeated, "What do you mean?"

"I want have a child with you," Taka said, "Together we could give birth to a new era! One where we are gods, and all bow before us!"

"You have got to be kidding me," I yelled, "Have a kid with you? Is that what this is all about? Jeez! There's no way in any reality where _I_ would have a child!"

"With Jun, maybe," Taka said, "But he can't offer you what I can. I can give you everything you ever wanted. You past, present and future! I can save you."

I tilted my head to the side, "I don't need saving."

Taka waved his hand to indicate all of me, "Now, but do you want three year old Lost to go through all the pain you did? Will you allow it, knowing you can stop Bunka from getting to her?"

I eyed Taka with suspicion to hide my desire to grab him and make him take me to the past. I said, "What time are you from?"

Taka said, "Ten years, to be exact. I know what happens to you, and it's not pretty."

Curiosity had my mouth saying words before my brain started paying attention to what I was saying, "What happens?"

"You die," Taka said cryptically. I gave him a _look_ and he started to explain, "Not right away or in a huge fight, but a little each day. Slowly your desire to live, or your ability to care about life, will just get chipped away as you go. Eventually you'll just be a shell, going through the moments. You won't even find pleasure in fighting. Then one night, you'll just go to bed and never wake up."

I gazed at Taka, unsure how to react. I died because I lost my will to live? Was that possible? I guess it was, but why would I? I may not be content, but that didn't mean I didn't want to live. If I was going to die it would be a warrior's death, not as some pathetic nobody.

"How would joining with you change that?" I asked.

"Because I won't try to make you be someone you're not," Taka said, "You'll be able to fight, and you won't have to pretend like you feel for others. I don't care rather or not you care about me, I just want to be by your side."

He'd be royal by default. He didn't have the power to be king, so he would make me queen. Smart, but pathetic. Though I did want what he offered. A chance to go back and change everything, who wouldn't want to do that? Even if my present didn't change, at least my past would.

"Why the Z fighters?" I asked, "Why do you want them dead?"

"So they can't stop us," Taka said, "Do you think they goody-two-shoes would let us just take over the universe and not try to stop us."

First the world and now he was talking about controlling the universe? I had to give him credit for dreaming big. I shrugged, "Vegeta might."

"He won't," Taka gave me an exasperated look, "He might act like he doesn't care, but he will stand by Goku. Our only chance is to kill them all."

Kill them all… Vegeta I could kill, same with Piccolo, Videl, Trunks and 18. I might feel bad about killing Goku, Gohan, and Krillin, but I couldn't kill Goten. Just the thought made me sick to my stomach. If I didn't kill him, and I did kill the others, Goten would never forgive me. He would do everything in his power to stop me or bring his family back.

Of course I could kill Dende, and with him the dragon balls would fade from existence. Goten might travel to Namek to use those dragon balls, but if I was taking over the universe I might as well destroy those one's as well, or use them for my own gain. Or I could just kill Goten…

If a new timeline was being created, then neither Goten nor the others would really be dead. Alternate versions of them will be able to grow old and die happy in a world better than this one. I wasn't made for the domestic life, and fighting it was only making me crazy. They all wanted Airi back, but I couldn't be her.

Goku and Chi-Chi needed their daughter back, and Gohan and Goten needed a sister who truly cared. The only way I could give them Airi back was to go back in time and save her. They couldn't have her in this world so they would have her in another.

"Deal," I said, "I'll kill the Z fighters, starting with Goku. But before I kill the others, you will take me back in time first."

A wicked smile slid across Taka's face. He held out his hand, and we shook on it. He said, "Done."

"Don't get up," I said.

Still holding his hand, I brought my leg up and slammed it against his head. The force of the kicked ripped him out of my grasped and sent him slamming to the ground. When it was clear that Taka would not be getting up the announcer counted to ten and announced me the winner.

I stared past Taka's limb body to where Goku and the others watched me. Each of them gazed at me with confused looks. They wouldn't understand that what I was about to do was for them. They wouldn't accept this gift, and would only see it as their death, but they would be happier in a world where I was what they wanted.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five**

**Love or Hate**

The fight between Gohan and Vegeta dragged on like a never ending torment. This waiting was worse than anything I had experienced the past year. I wanted to get the fight with Goku over with already. The sooner I did, the sooner I could go back to when I was three.

I tried to imagine what that would be like, to look down at the innocent Airi before she was hardened by blood and war. Back before I had forgotten how to smile. I could see her wide eyes, as soft and innocent as Goku's, staring up at me. The little girl would be happy, and know what it means to feel love. For a brief moment I was actually jealous of her.

I was jealous that she would grow up with only worries about what she wanted to be as an adult and what clothes to wear. She would be able to play and have fun, and never be torn down or broken. I quickly banished the train of thought my brain was taking. Why should I be jealous? Sure, the kid would grow up safe and wanted, but she wouldn't be as powerful as I am. I hate Bunka with ever cell in my body, but he did make me powerful. He spent fifteen years making me strong enough to kill Goku.

I laughed. I was about to complete the last mission Bunka had given me. My whole reason for coming to Earth was to end Goku's existence. I guess Bunka would get the final laugh after all. The thought pissed me off. I slipped into an even worse mood.

The others could sense it too. Goku had tried to ask me what had been going on between Taka and I, but I had brushed him off. Then there was Gohan who kept giving me worried looks before his fight, but he hadn't said anything. No one else bothered me, and they were right not to. I probably would have ripped their heads off before they could blink.

Instead I stood at the mouth of the room, with my arms crossed and my eyes focused on Vegeta. I had seen Gohan fight, so I knew his style. If I was going to fight Vegeta I would have to study his movements, and predicted what attack he would make next. Vegeta was clever, but this was something I was good at. I was able to fallow his movements without trying.

This was the first fight I hadn't been able to make a prediction about who was going to win. The men where both extraordinary fighters, and even though neither of the powered up to Super Saiyan form, they were almost evenly matched. It only made the fight more enjoyable.

Nearly an hour had passed before Gohan was knocked through the air. Vegeta wrapped his hands around Gohan's ankle and swung him around before lunching him to the ground with such force that Gohan hadn't had time to stop himself. He banged into the ground, and it caved underneath him, creating a small creator.

Vegeta smirked as he lowered himself down next to Gohan and the announcer called out that he was the winner. Vegeta walked back to where the rest of us stood and stopped as he past Goku and me. He said, "Beat the brat quick, Goku. The next fight will finally prove that I am the strongest fighter."

"Good luck with that, Oompa Loompa," I said as Vegeta continued past me. I was only an inch or two taller than him, but aside from the boys (who were quickly catching up) and Krillin, he was still the shortest Z fighter.

Vegeta spun around and waved one of his fist at me, "You take that back, you brat!"

I opened my mouth to reply just as the announcer called mine and Goku's name. I sneered at Vegeta, "Sorry, no time to play. Say hi to Wonka for me."

I turned on my heels and gave Vegeta a wave goodbye as I followed Goku out to the arena. We faced each other. I stared into the familiar dark eyes of Goku, and slid into a fighting stance. Goku did the same and I launched off the ground.

I flew across the arena, bringing my leg back and aiming it right at Goku's head. Moving faster than me, Goku lifted his arm and blocked my kick with the outside of his forearm. I spun, turning full circle and aimed my fist at his face. Goku caught my wrist in his hand with ease. When I tried to punch my way free with the other hand, Goku caught that wrist as well.

Goku spun me around so that my back was to his chest and my arms were crossed in front of my chest. I could feel Goku's breath on my ear as he said, "We've been here before, haven't we?"

I ducked under his arms and pulled him forward just like I had done almost a year ago. This time when I brought my knee up to ram it into his gut, Goku caught it.

"That's not how it happened last time," I said, hopping away from Goku.

Goku nodded his head once, "Last time was different."

"You're right," I said. I clenched my fist, my arms bending at the elbows, and focused my energy to raise my power level. My clothes begun to flow around me form the force of my energy. "This time will end much differently."

Goku opened his mouth, but I didn't wait to hear what he was about to say. I rushed forward again, brought up my knee, and dug it deep into Goku's gut. His body arched from the speed of the blow, before he was sent tumbling through the air. I flew to cut him off and slammed my interlocked fist against his head. Goku flew back toward the arena, crashing into it hard enough to make a dent.

I lowered myself down to the floor and stood over him as he got to his feet. There wasn't even a scratch on him. What we were doing was child's play. Goku could have blocked those attacks. Hell, Pan could have blocked those attacks. I gritted my teeth. Why wasn't he fighting back?

I pushed off the ground, rising over head so that I was several feet above Goku. I brought the heels of my hands together and quickly focused an energy wave, and I sent rocketing at Goku. He crossed his forearms in front of his face just as the energy wave hit its target. Goku looked at me from the space between his wrists.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

"Waiting," Goku replied simply.

I stared at him baffled. "Waiting for what?"

"You to kill me," Goku said.

The force of shook I felt could have knocked me out of the sky. He knew. How did he know? Our Saiyan hearing was good, but not that good. There was no way he could know. Unless there was some secret mind reading power that he possessed and hadn't bothered telling me, but I doubted that.

"H-h-how…" I stuttered.

"Piccolo," Goku said lowering his arms. "He heard ever word, and relayed the conversation to me."

"Spoil sport," I mumbled. I crossed my arms over my chest, "I know you don't understand, but I'm doing this for you. You don't have to believe me."

"How does killing us benefit us?" Goku asked.

"If I kill you," I said, lowering myself back to the ground, "Taka will take me back in time. I can save your daughter and give you the life with her that you want."

"That's not what I want," Goku said. His brows pulled together as he stared at me. "_You_ are my daughter. I want _you_ in my life."

"No you don't," I replied, "Airi is the girl you want, not me! Everyone wants Airi, the true daughter of Goku."

"Lost, what are you talking about?" Goku said, "You are my daughter!"

I shook my head, "Ever since I came back all I have heard is be good, show mercy, be compassionate! You want me to be Airi, or what she would have been, and yet you want to create Lost, by condemning her to hell."

"I'm not trying to condemn you," Goku said, taking a step forward.

"I will not abandon her to the same fate as me," I said, my voice shifting to a deadly calm. Goku froze in his tracks. "And I will give you the daughter that everyone wants, even if I have to kill you to do it."

Goku said, "Bunka has completely messed up your mind."

Goku reached for my arm but I grabbed his wrist and twisted his arm until he fell on one knee. I leaned over him, forcing him closer to the ground. I said, "I will go back and save Airi. I will kill Bunka _before_ he ruins her, so you guys can be happy."

"You," Goku grimaced, "You are going back to save _you_, but it won't change anything. You'll still be the way you are in this time, only the past you will be the one to grow up without Bunka's influence."

"At least she'll grow up safe," I released Goku's hand and turned away from him.

"Are you doing this for us?" Goku said getting to his feet, "Or for you?"

"Both," I said.

"You know if you do this you'll never meet Stone or Jun," Goku said, "And no one will forgive you for what you've done."

"I also won't be tortured, or kill billions of innocent people, or try to kill my family," I said. I turned to face him, "No more talking. This ends now."

I charged at Goku again. He began blocking all my attacks, forcing me to attack harder. Goku wouldn't hit back, even after the fight took us off the ground and into the air. Frustrated, I faked a punch to Goku's jaw. When he moved to block it, I spun in a three-sixty in the other direction and kicked Goku in the head. This gave me the advantages to put everything I had into beating him down. Instinct took over, and Goku at last started fighting back.

Both of us continued to raise our energy levels to be stronger than the other. As the fight raged on, I raised my energy well above Goku's and managed to knock him back down to the ground. I brought my hands in front of me and begun shooting energy ball after energy ball at him. First Goku stood there, blocking each of them, until he charged at me.

Goku closed his fist and slammed it against my jaw, sending me back a few feet. I wiped a stray drop of blood from my lip and the fight continued until I was knocked to the ground.

With Goku hovering over head, I had had enough of this game. I brought the heels of him hands together once again, and begun, "Ka!"

Goku quickly did the same and together our voices rung out in the air around us, "Mehameha!"

Our energy waves collided with enough force to make the ground beneath us shake. Bits of the arena begun to rise in the air, and I could hear the panicked screams of the onlookers. I focused more of my energy into my hands, pushing it at Goku. My energy wave begun to push his, there was enough strength to seriously damage him. That's when I felt it.

Goku's energy level begun to sky rocket upward and I knew he was rising to a Super Saiyan. The ground rumpled as his energy ball soared toward me, pushing mine like it was nothing. I tried to push back, but it was no use. Goku's energy collided into me.

In a blinding white-blue light I collapsed to the ground. Breathing hard, but hardly damaged. Goku must have moved the Kamehameha to the side at the last minute, so the majority of the blow hit next to me instead of head on. I stayed on the ground, regaining my strength.

I didn't look up, but I could feel Goku watching me. He stood on the other side of the arena, unmoving. Finally I mustered my strength and glanced around. Everyone in the stands stood awestruck as rubble continued to fall around me. The arena was in near ruin after that attack, and the sky was dark with the power we had released.

I pulled myself off the ground and dusted off my hands. I wiped my arm across my face and stared down at the blood smear on my skin. I may have been able to fight Goku as a regular Saiyan, but as a Super Saiyan I was still no match for him. I turned to Goku. His hair was back to its raven color.

"Fifteen years of live and death situations," Goku said, "and you're almost as strong as a Super Saiyan. I'm surprised you haven't become one yet."

"Someone won't tell me how," I spat.

"I was going to when I thought you were ready," Goku said softly. He gave me a pointed look and I glared at him.

I said, "Whatever."

"I'm sorry," Goku said.

I raised my eyebrow, "For what? Not teaching me or not killing me when you had the chance?"

"Neither," Goku said, giving me a sympathetic look, "I'm sorry about everything that still haunts you. If you just give it time, things will get better."

"You know you're always saying that," I said. "How I just need time, and how you guys will always protect me and you'll always be there. You think you can fix me with hugs and kisses and by telling me everything will be okay? Well, it's not okay."

"Lost, I-" Goku started, but I wasn't done yet.

"The truth is," I continued, "I don't feel happiness, and I don't feel love. I don't feel anything. It's like I'm waiting every moment for the next blow. The twisted thing is I think I want it to come. I think I want to feel the pain, just to know I can still feel _something_."

"You do feel," Goku said, "You said you wanted to give us what you thought we wanted. You want to give us a better future, one where you think you can't hurt us. You want this because you care about our happiness. If you would just give it a chance you'll see."

"I did give it a chance," I was almost yelling now, "I gave you a year! Nothing has changed. _I_ haven't changed. You don't know how hard it is for me here…"

"Because you never talk to me, Lost!" Goku yelled.

I took an involuntary step back. I'd seen Goku mad. I witnessed firsthand what happened if you managed to push his buttons, but never had he raised his voice to me with such anger. I had gotten in so much trouble during my short time on earth, and not once did Goku so much as glared. He gave me a few disappointed looks, but nothing like this.

"You won't let anyone in, Lost," Goku continued, his voice returning to normal. It was filled with desperation. "I want to know what it was like for you all those years you were away. I want you to tell me how your feeling, and when things are bothering you. I can only help you so much, if you refuse to let me."

"It doesn't change anything," I said, but it did. Somehow, in ways I didn't understand, it changed everything. Goku knew it to, only he was able to say it out loud.

"Yes, it does," Goku said, "You love Goten and Pan. I've seen it in your eyes, and you love Jun. You just need to realize that what you're feeling _is_ love. But if you really want to kill me, then fine." Goku throughout his arms, making himself an easy target, "Go ahead and kill me. I won't stop you."

"Wait, what?" I asked, "You'll… just let me kill you?"

"I told you once I wasn't going to fight you," Goku said, "Not like this. So if you truly want me dead, here's your chance."

I said, "I also said that if you didn't fight me I would kill Goten, and right now we have an entire stadium of people for me to pick off!"

Goku smiled. It wasn't a twisted grin, like he was daring me to do it, but his genuine lopsided grin. He honestly believed I wouldn't do it. My jaw tightened in irritation. Goku said, "Go ahead."

I stared at him in shook. What was he playing at? Whatever it was, two could play at this game. I raised my hand, aiming it at the section I knew Chi-Chi was. I began forming an energy wave, keeping a watchful eye on Goku. He didn't even flinch. Once then energy wave was completed I released it.

In an orange orb, the energy raced toward the stands. I could hear the people screaming and knew they would begin rushing to get out of the way. I was sure Goku would make some kind of move to stop me, but he only continued to smile. At the last second, I knew why.

In the short moments before the energy wave hit, I could see Chi-Chi clearly in my mind as if she was standing before me. I remembered how she always could carry on a conversation with me, even when I didn't talk back. She was annoying, always talking about careers I would be good at. She finally decided that I should be a teacher at a local martial arts studio, since I didn't need a degree for that. Then there was the gentleness of her motherly touch.

Then there was Pan, trying to teach me how to play tag and telling me all about the annoying kids in her first grade class. Or Goten convincing me to go to my own birthday party at Kame house, and the hours Gohan had spent trying to teach me basic learning skills that I had missed out on during my time with Bunka. Jun and Stone would be there too, and we had too many good memories to just focus on one.

"Damn it!" I yelled. I turned my hand up, causing the energy wave to soar towards the sky and grow smaller until it vanished completely.

Fifteen years of building a wall, of making me strong and cold to the world, and it was all tumbling down. The walls I had built crashed around me like they were made of paper, and I couldn't breathe. If this was what love felt like, I hated it. I pressed the heels of my hand into my eyes. For the first time in a very long time, I felt tears bubbling up.

My knees buckle, but before I could fall to the ground Goku caught me. I pressed my face into his chest and couldn't stop the tears. God, how pathetic was I? I was never supposed to cry, I was so much stronger than this. I needed to stop, but after fighting them back for so long they would no longer be silenced. The dam that kept them at bay was gone.

I was so confused. Nothing was making sense to me. It was like everything was in another language and I was the fool how couldn't speak it. I wanted so many different things, but I didn't know which one to chose. I couldn't decide which one I wanted more. It was so frustrating. I just wanted it all to stop.

"I don't know what I'm doing," I said into Goku's shirt. It was the first time I had been openly honest to anyone about how lost I truly was, "I don't know how to be anything else."

Goku rubbed my back. It wasn't awkward, like so many times before. Now it was simply a father comforting his daughter at her time of need. He said, "I know, Lost. It's going to be hard, but you just…"

Goku's voice trailed off. I pulled my head back far enough so I could look Goku in the eye and said, "Give it time?"

Goku smiled and nodded. He leaned forward and kissed my forehead. When he pulled back to look at me, he said, "I will help you every step of the way." He paused, as if in thought, "This fight did end very differently than the last time."

I couldn't help roll my eyes, but I rested my head on Goku's chest again. I focused on taking strength from his arms that held me tight. I tried to find the feeling of safety within them. Instead of fighting the feelings and running from them, I needed to let them in, just like Goku had said. I wasn't at war with the world anymore, just myself.

For the first time, I truly thought things could be okay. Until that peaceful moment was ripped away, and I lost it. In one fast movement Goku was ripped away from me. I stumbled as he flew across the arena and crashed into the ground just shy of falling off the edge and out of the ring. I turned to the attacker and saw Taka standing across from me, his arms raised and ready to fight.

"I should have known you would be too weak," Taka spat the words at me, "I thought coming here would be far enough, but I should have traveled to the day you arrived on this planet."

Had Taka just taken Goku by surprise, or was he secretly more powerful then he was letting on? Since he could mask his power level I was leaning more toward the ladder. Either way it didn't matter, no one who called me weak and attacked my family survived.

I swung out my fist and punched Taka in the face, sending him flying back. He landed on the ground and tired to get up. I rushed forward and slammed my boot down on his chest, keeping him in place.

"Go ahead," I snarled down at the boy, "Go back to that day and ask me to join you. I'd kill you faster than you could say oops."


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six**

**Infected**

All the thoughts of what I could do to Taka ran through my head, I just had to pick one. There were so many to choose from. What punishment do you give someone who threatens your family? I could cut him apart, piece by piece. I'd start with his toes and his fingers, working my way joint by joint. Or I could go the easier rout and just blow him away. Why bother wasting time with such a loser?

I clenched and unclenched my jaw. I didn't matter how I killed him, as long as I erased him from the face of the earth. I reached down and grabbed hold of his shirt, pulling his face closer to mine.

"You shouldn't have joined this tournament, Taka," I said, between clenched teeth, "You are a fool."

"Lost, listen to me," Taka pleaded. Out of the corner of my eye I noticed him messing with the device on his wrist, "You know you want to kill Goku. You always have, because you don't care about him. That's why you came to this planet!"

My hold on Taka slipped as a fog seemed to settle in my head. Is that what I wanted? I took a step away, releasing him. I shook my head trying to get the fog to lift, but it was no use. Why had I come to this planet?

At the edge of my memory I knew the answer but it was out of my reach. Every time I tried to catch it, it moved further way. I was sent to earth for a reason, to kills someone. I had come to kill Goku. Didn't I?

I shook my head again and pressed the heels of my hands into my temples as the fog began to grow. Somewhere in the distance I could hear Taka's voice like a lighthouse on a cliff, guiding me.

"You want to kill everyone," He was saying, his voice like honey. "You want to kill Goku, and Piccolo and Vegeta. Even Goten and Gohan. You hate them all. You want them to burn!"

I felt rage bubble in my chest, but it was wired, like it wasn't really mine. It was foreign, but at the same time I recognized it. I had felt something like this before. I hated someone like this before. But was it Goku? Why did I hate Goku?

"Kill them, Lost!" Taka yelled.

I felt something snap within me, my will, as the fog took over. I blinked, but I couldn't clear it. _Kill them_, _kill them, kill them_. Kill them because you hate them. I raised my hand started firing energy balls all around me, destroying the stadium. Explosions echoed around me, mirrored by the sounds of screaming people.

"Lost, stop!" Goku yelled, "What are you doing?!"

I turned to face him and fired an energy ball at his face. Goku easily whacked the wave away as if it was nothing more than a bug.

"Why are you doing this?" Goku asked. He was talking to me, but his focus was on Taka.

"Because I hate you," I said, I moved forward to attack him, "I have always hated you."

Goku's eyes dart to mine, "What?"

I opened my mouth but I was it in the back by an energy ball that knocked me to the ground. I jumped to my feet and spun around to see Piccolo standing a few feet away. He had stripped out of his weighted clothes and was standing ready to fight me, ready to intervene again.

I turned and raised my hands. With one I began creating another energy wave, one strong enough to knock his smirk of his green face, with the other one I begun creating the barrier. I released the energy wave, and Piccolo dodged to one side. I turned the ball, bringing it back toward Piccolo so he had to move toward the barrier. As he dodged it again I brought the barrier down so it closed around him and trapping him inside.

"Lost," Goku said. He was right behind me now, close enough that all he had to do was raise his hand and he could hit me. "Lost, you need to stop. What is going on?"

I turned to face him, "I'm doing what I came to this planet to do."

Goku looked at me confused, "What are you talking about?"

I lifted my hand, with my fingers fully extended, back to the barrier where Piccolo stood. He was unmoving inside, knowing that he wouldn't be able to get out even if he tired.

"I came here to kill you, Gohan, Vegeta," I closed my hand and the barrier shrunk, smaller and smaller, crushing Piccolo inside until it vanished completely, "and Piccolo."

Despite the chaos around me, everything was silent as Goku stared at me. His eyes were hard, almost cold. His fist where clenched in fist and his body vibrated with tension. I knew what was coming. A real fight, a true fight, between me and him. This was the fight I had been waiting for, the only fight I wanted.

"How could you!" Gohan yelled. I turned my gaze to see him, Goten, and Videl standing a few feet away. Stupid of them to bring _her_ here, I could crush her like a bug. "You killed Piccolo!"

"I'd be more worried about you right now," I said slowly.

I took a step forward, but was once again knocked to the side by a blow to the face. This time I didn't fall to the ground, I only stumbled. I caught myself and turned to see Stone standing with her fist raised.

"That punch has been brought to you by wake the hell up!" Stone yelled at my face, "What the hell are you doing?"

"Why does everyone keep asking me that like it's not obvious?" I asked, blinking at her.

"Because this isn't you!" Jun said, landing next to Stone. "You know it isn't!"

"This is me," I said, "This is what I- what we- came here to do!"

"No," Stone said, shaking her head. She step forward and grabbed my shoulders and begun shaking me as hard as she could, "WAKE UP! WAKE UP! WAKE UP!"

"You're wasting your time," All eyes turned to Taka. Stone paused in shaking me, "She's already started. She needs to finish what she started. Don't you, Lost? And you'll kill anyone who gets in your way."

I nodded my head. I reached up and took hold of Stone's chin and turned her face to me. She blinked at me. I reached my other hand around to the back of her head. In one quick movement, I snapped her neck. Stone's body fell lifeless to the ground and I stared at it… at her.

Stone, my best friend, was dead. I had killed Stone. What had I just done?

I dropped to my knees and gasped for air, but it was like my lungs forgot how to work. The world spun around me and the fog begun to fade away. All I could see was Stone. Her kissing the top of my head when I was seven just because I told her not to, or sleeping in my bed to protect me from my nightmares despite my denial of having them, and her always standing beside me no matter how bad things got.

"What did I just do?" I yelled at the ground.

"Get up, Lost!" Taka yelled, "Finish what you where sent here to do!"

"Jun, get Lost out of here!" Goku yelled.

I pounded my fist into the ground, creating dents in the arena floor. Why wasn't anyone listening to me? "What did I just do?" I asked again.

Again no one answered. I felt arms wrap around my stomach and I was yanked of the ground. I knew it was Jun, but I fought him. I looked over his shoulder as Stone got further and further away. Jun ran with me in his arms back into the waiting area where he dropped me on the floor.

I didn't move. Pain spread through my body, but it wasn't physical. I pressed my hands against my chest, right over my heart, where it felt like my heart was going to shatter. I screamed, as loud and as high as I could until Jun pressed his hand over my mouth. I moved my head to the side and pushed his hand away.

"What is wrong with me, Jun?" I said, "Something is wrong with me!"

"I know," Jun said. He started running his hands through my hair, over my body.

"Jun, this is no time for flirting!" I said trying to grab his wrist.

He smacked my hands away, "If you think _this_ is flirting, I wonder what your idea of s- you know what, we'll talk about that later. Something is making you act this way.

He pushed my hair away from my ear. His fingers ran along my hair line until I felt a tingling and heard a pop. It was like someone had blown away all the fogginess in my head and I could see things clearly again. All the confusion was gone.

I knew everything that I had done.

"What the hell?" I asked. I turned to Jun. In his hand he held something that looked like a pushpin. He examined it closely. "What is that?"

"I think it's some kind of device that was releasing toxins into you limbic system," Jun said, turning the little pushpin over in his hands, "It would explain why you're emotions have been all over the place."

I nodded like I knew what he was talking about, and whipped tears I hadn't realized I had been crying, but I was newly confused again and I didn't like it. "The hell is my limbic system?"

"Hmmm?" Jun asked looking at me, "Oh, it's the part of your brain that controls your emotions. That's why you've been so… weird."

I clenched and unclenched my jaw, "I don't think it was just wreaking havoc on my emotions."

"What do you mean?" Jun asked.

"I had been really confused," I said, trying to find the right words to explain what had happened. "When you asked Goku to marry me I was freaked out. I didn't think I could be a wife or mother, but then I was considering it?" I shook my head, "Then when Taka told me to kill Goku and the others. At first I wasn't interested, but the more he talked the more it made since."

"And you did try to kill Goku," Jun confirmed, "You killed Piccolo, and Stone."

"Yeah," I turned my gaze to his, ignoring the part about Stone, "But then when I was fighting Goku and he started talking about how deep down I loved him and everyone and how I would never kill them, and then I couldn't."

Jun nodded, "It was making you easy to influence. The more one person pushed something on you the more you started to cave." Jun sighed and leaned against the wall, "Taka must have put this on you in order to get you to make sure you said yes. He had to have put it on you before the tournament even started."

"Great," I said, remembering how Taka had said he had spied on my in the forest that day with Pan.

Taka had convinced me to kill Goku, Goku had convinced me not to kill the others or him, and I had cried… twice! Then I had killed Piccolo and… Everything I had done over the last twenty-four hours was called into question. Without that device spitting shit into my brain, would I really have killed the others? I didn't believe that I would have kill Stone or either Jun or Goten, but Chi-Chi or Gohan? Videl and Vegeta sure, but what about Krillin?

I rubbed my hands over my face. It didn't matter now, that was all in the past. What I needed to do now was focus on Taka. I was going to destroy that kid.

"What I want to know is how he was injecting you with this," Jun said, as he examined the device more closely, "I doesn't look like it has any kind of timer…"

"The other device," I said, remembering the one on Taka's arm, "He was messing with it right before I… killed Piccolo."

"That would explain a lot," Jun said.

"Come on," I said, rolling to my feet, "We are going to kill Taka."

"That's not going to change anything," Jun said, "Killing never does."

I rolled my eyes at him. "Then I'll just beat him up!"

"We need to think!" Jun said, getting to his own feet, "We need a plan to fix this!"

"Fix what?" I yelled.

"We need to bring Stone back," Jun said, "We could use the dragon balls."

"You don't have time," Gohan said, walking toward us. He looked like he had been in a fight, with dirt and scratches all over him.

"What was going on out there?" I asked.

"Taka can… teleport," Gohan said, "Every time we are about to get a shot in, he disappears and reappears somewhere else."

"There's a device on his wrist," I said, "Does he ever mess with it?"

Gohan raised his eyebrow at me, "Yeah, all the time."

"He's not teleporting," I said, crossing my arms over my chest, "He's time traveling." Gohan opened his mouth, but I held up my hand to silence him, "I don't have time to explain. We need that device."

"How do you plan to get it?" Gohan asked.

"Easy," Jun said, "We blow up this building. Lost walks out of the ruble and over to Taka and claims that she killed you, that she's finishing her mission. If he asked about me, you say that you kill me as well because I got in the way. Then, as soon as he is distracted, take the device and travel back in time to before you… do anything."

I nodded and shot an energy ball at the wall causing it explode into ruble. Jun and Gohan joined in until there was almost nothing left of the waiting area. I took a deep breath and took one last look at Jun and my brother before turning on my heels and leaving the ruble.

On the arena, Goku and Vegeta where standing at one end while Taka stood at the other. All three of them were staring at me. With my chin held high, I walked across the arena and over to Taka, not looking at Goku or Vegeta.

Taka eyed me like a viper about to attack. He said, "What happened?"

"I killed Gohan," I said. Out of the corner of my eye I saw the muscles in Goku's body twitch.

Taka nodded, his face went from being cautious to smug, "And Jun?"

"He got in my way," I said, "So I killed him, too."

"Good girl," Taka reached up and ran his thumb along my cheek, "But you're not done yet. You still need to kill Goku and Vegeta. And then we will be together forever, wont we?"

I took everything I had not to flinch away from his touch. I nodded and took his hand in mine, the one with the device. "Forever."

I grabbed the device and kneed Taka between the legs, and pulled the device from his wrist. Taka groaned and fell to his knees. I brought by my leg and kicked Taka in the jaw. I slapped the device on my wrist and started down at the device.

It was metallic silver, like metal. With a thousand little buttons on it that seemed to peep and swarm. "Shit!" I yelled and spun back to the building I had just destroyed, "Jun, I don't know how to work this thing!"

At my words, both Jun and Gohan came sailing out of the rubble and landed next to me. Jun grabbed my arm just as Goku ran over to us. Jun looked at the device, pressing buttons. It looked random, but he obviously knew what he was doing.

"What's taking so long?" I asked. Gohan but his hand on my shoulder, as if to calm me, but it didn't work. I felt like the world was speeding up around me.

"There!" Jun said, pushing a button.

The world spun around me, going so fast it all begun to blur. I heard someone calling me name, but I couldn't tell who it was. My feet lifted off the ground and I thrown wildly around until I slammed into the ground again.


End file.
